Most of my friends (who are also most of my readers, thank you!) aren’t avid campers and that’s completely ok. This means that you may not be aware that the camper community is not a homogenous crowd but consists of subgroups that travel more or less the same streets, exchange friendly words in passing, but can be distinguished easily:
Foor example the “Wicked Camper” is usually an overseas traveller who just finished high school, does fruit-picking jobs along the way and can only afford a vehicle that’s older than himself. As the van has no air condition and breaks down regularly remote destinations and dusty corrugation roads are off-limits for this traveller.
There is the well-known sub-group, the “Grey Nomad”, mostly couples, who migrate with the weather patterns to remain in climate zones that give relief to their arthritic joints. Their big comfortable camper trailers fit snuggly on most caravan sites and come with extendable washing lines and Foxtel.
And then there is the “Bush Camper” who can usually be identified by the crust of dirt on his car and trailer. They usually enjoy the solace of unpaid sites in the middle of nowhere and get frustrated when their supply of either XXXX Gold or self-caught barra is depleted forcing them to return to a place that has a supermarket and/or bottle-shop.
Lastly, there are two types of Bush Campers – those who dig it and those who don’t. Digging is to be understood in its literal meaning here and while bush camping there is only one reason to dig a hole. Yes, for a number two.
When venturing out into the wilderness to the last remote spots where no showers exist and even the pit toilet counts as luxury there are those who just let loose and dump their outgoings wherever they like and leave their toilet paper as an indicator flagging “don’t come here unless you want to take a look at the pretty floral print of my Kleenex Extra Soft and what I had for lunch yesterday”.
Then there are the conscientious poopers who dutifully shoulder their shovel and make sure that no traces of any sort are left behind.
This is of course no laughing matter. Next time you venture into the wild and instead of a pristine landscape find toilet paper flapping in the wind I want to see the look on YOUR face!